Giving Thanks in Maryland

We had a great time in Maryland visiting KC ,Emily, Alex, Bennett, and Ruby over Thanksgiving. The triplets have changed so much just since we saw them in August! They sing songs, play Ring around the Rosie (Ruby runs as she goes around the circle), run and walk fast, and learn new things so quickly.
They love being tossed "away" and tickled, and grabbed by the fish monster (a fish shaped oven mitt). When Clyde got worn out after tossing them on the couch, he invited them to a 'jumping place' on the couch with the cushions removed. This became a favorite!
Jumping on the couch


The weather was gorgeous, the food was great, and the company was delightful.
We had fun outdoors.

We loved getting up early with the babies and bedtime at 9:30 felt great too! They love a certain CD of classical music and ask for it as soon as they get in the car - "Muthsik? Bum, bum, bum?" and then they sing along to the rhythm. So fun. I cannot get enough of this one and I'm so glad I captured it as we were driving.
The Sing Along song




We miss them already!

Taking it apart

I'm physically and emotionally exhausted. As evidenced by my tears, two (2!) cold sores and raw heart. Just completed the 2nd round ( two 9 hour days) of clean out of my parents’ home. Some things we ran across were so tender and full of love. Letters from mom and dad to each other in the 40’s. Love notes from flowers sent when Dad was away. Letters from a father to a daughter or from a grandmother to a 10 year old girl. They saved everything. Kept every talk, handouts from meetings, tons of stuff they had learned or were interested in over 90+ years. Such darling and handsome people in their early years. It was a little bit freeing to toss so much stuff that had accumulated, yet also felt a bit betraying to toss stuff that embodied the person – lessons, talks, book reviews, church notes, recipes, high school and college notes, teaching class notes. We came across so many items that triggered a memory of earlier family times, or an amazement of something we did not even know (like Dad had been invited to do something for the United Nations! Mom was the freshman secretary at BYU) That he bought his home for $12000 and he made a $7600 down payment!
The home is one deep layer cleaned out – nothing in the kitchen cabinets, all files and drawers and closets empty, furniture spoken for, treasures divided up and packed for transport. Here are the items Dad used to teach himself Russian in the 50's - 60's!

I learned that it is not just about the ‘stuff’ and who gets it. It is an opportunity to nurture and preserve relationships.
I just hope my heart can heal soon from the wide open rawness and tender feelings. Thanks for the memories, Jim and Jennie Carlson.

The cleanout has begun

and here is what I have learned about my parents:
My dad had a comb in every coat pocket and in his tennis bag. He had a lot of coats. Apparently he always had nice hair.
He must have purchased many new handkerchiefs every year - we found SO many in his drawers.
Growing up in the Depression causes you to keep everything that might come in use someday, even if you replaced it with newer and better stuff. Especially if you had a cranny to store it.
Holding on to something simple like a GI issue Gillette razor and boxed blades since 1943 makes it turn into something really old and amazing to look at.
He wrote Mom some very sweet love notes. And she kept them.

My mom wrote out every talk and lesson she gave, word for word. And they were full of good thoughts and lessons.
My mom read and reviewed many books over 50 years for her book club, as evidence by pages and pages of review lecture notes. A bit different than how my book group does things.

My mom was continually learning. There were so many articles clipped out of magazines, good thoughts, notes from lessons, and recipes in every possible form in every possible spot. She loved to cook and think about trying new things. She made a lot (a LOT) of mints and chocolates for many many people - keeping logs of who and how many for each year since the 1970's.

seeing all these old items takes me back to a time long ago when I was a little girl and looking at cool items in our house.

these figurines were so much a part of our growing up memories. Even the many times they were broken!

small world

The world is a very large place, with a lot of people in it. But we are all connected on various levels.
This morning i hopped a plane at the Provo airport bound for Denver.
A nice young girl sat next to me, but I was super tired and I slept a good part of the short flight. We started to talk as we were beginning the descent into Denver.
We talked about our reasons for flying - me to clean out my Dad's house, her to go to a wedding in Houston. I asked if she was a bridesmaid and found out she was the photographer, normally based in Provo. I mentioned that we had just had a wedding and Lindsey Orton had shot the photos.
This girl, Nicole Carmen, had grown up in the same ward as Lindsey and did not even know she was a photographer!
She mentioned she went to Timpview and I said so did my children.
I told her we lived in Indian hills. She asked if I knew the Shumways!
Megan was one of her best friends! I told her Shumways lived through our back yard!
She wondered if she knew any of my children, so we talked about names and ages. None were quite her age, but some sounded familiar.
We found out that her sister Cami Carmen was in the circle of Michelle's friends in high school.

Then she said Camille sounded really familiar and asked me if Camille has a friend, Claudia Slagowski. I said yes!
This girl, Nicole Carmen, was best friends with the little sister of Claudia, named Alicia.
Nicole Carmen, the photographer sitting next to me on the plane, remembers doing things with Camille and Claudia and EVEN coming to our house! She and Alicia were the little tag along sisters and thought Camille and Claudia were super cool.
She even remembered the blue bedroom that Camille had then, and said she loved our house.
She says she has not hung out or seen her first grade buddy for 18 years, but she remembers vividly coming with her to our house!

Small world indeed.

Our true characters

enough said.
We had some fun times.

Fear not

Lately I've been listening to April General Conference on CD as I drive to work and around town. The talks are just about the right length for an errand. But the gem I did not expect was the songs from the conference meetings. So far they have been such wonderful inspiring arrangements that I find myself hitting replay on the songs over and over! Truly uplifting. The words and arrangement to "How Firm a Foundation" have been especially poignant to me today because of some trials in my life.
I found this quote about the verses:
A powerful feature of the text is that the last five verses are written as if they are being spoken by Jesus himself to His faithful followers; a poetic summary of the reassurance one finds throughout scripture. The final declaration reassures repeatedly that Jesus will “never, no never, no never forsake” us.

the entire set of verses:

1. How firm a foundation, ye Saints of the Lord,
Is laid for your faith in his excellent word!
What more can he say than to you he hath said,
Who unto the Savior, who unto the Savior,
Who unto the Savior for refuge have fled?

2. In ev’ry condition—in sickness, in health,
In poverty’s vale or abounding in wealth,
At home or abroad, on the land or the sea—
As thy days may demand, as thy days may demand,
As thy days may demand, so thy succor shall be.

3. Fear not, I am with thee; oh, be not dismayed,
For I am thy God and will still give thee aid.
I’ll strengthen thee, help thee, and cause thee to stand,
Upheld by my righteous, upheld by my righteous,
Upheld by my righteous, omnipotent hand.

4. When through the deep waters I call thee to go,
The rivers of sorrow shall not thee o’erflow,
For I will be with thee, thy troubles to bless,
And sanctify to thee, and sanctify to thee,
And sanctify to thee thy deepest distress.

5. When through fiery trials thy pathway shall lie,
My grace, all sufficient, shall be thy supply.
The flame shall not hurt thee; I only design
Thy dross to consume, thy dross to consume,
Thy dross to consume and thy gold to refine.

6. E’en down to old age, all my people shall prove
My sov’reign, eternal, unchangeable love;
And then, when gray hair shall their temples adorn,
Like lambs shall they still, like lambs shall they still,
Like lambs shall they still in my bosom be borne.

7. The soul that on Jesus hath leaned for repose
I will not, I cannot, desert to his foes;
That soul, though all hell should endeavor to shake,
I’ll never, no never, I’ll never, no never,
I’ll never, no never, no never forsake!

And the new ending of the song goes like this:
Men's voices - "Fear not, I am with thee...
Pause,
Women's voices very slow - "Fear not, I am with thee"

stunning.
This ending certainly caught my heart listening and thinking and being strengthened by the message.
I'll be buying CDs of conference again, to be sure I can hear the wonderful songs!

23 Days

A lot has happened in the last 23 days.
My father E. James Carlson passed away.
A funeral in Aurora, Colorado.
A memorial service and burial in Logan, Ut.
Nicole and Casey moved to Ft. Collins, Colorado.
KC and Emily brought the triplets to Utah for a 10 day visit.
Camille married Tyler.

Can a heart be so broken apart and yet so full?
I'm grateful for prayer, love of family, and the hand of the Lord in my life.
It's been a glorious ride.